Stigma and Discrimination

A total of 15 participants, comprising of 11 female and four male, reported experiences of stigma and discrimination. Among the women, the most affected were widows. Of the 11 women, seven were widowed and they reported more difficulties in social relationships than the other categories of women. The stigma and discrimination expressed itself in several forms. Among the most prevalent forms were friends distancing themselves, and deserting or rejecting the participants. One of the widows remarked thus:

There are some friends I used to have that when they knew that I had HIV, it appeared like now they were pulling out. Even female friends whom I had who were close to me, I could now see that they were keeping away from me. They were looking at me from far. For an example, there is a co-wife of mine, she is married to my in-law, and we used to love each other very much. But when she saw that I was beginning to be ailing/sickly…when I had rashes, she was now keeping off (R2: widow, aged ≥46 years, 83).

Besides cases of being deserted by friends, there were also cases of abandonment by family members. A 31-year-old female participant who was discovered to be positive while her husband tested negative was abandoned by the husband. Below is an excerpt of the discussion:

Interviewer (I): And you said that your husband was also tested together with you and he was found to be also infected…no he was found to be negative

Respondent (R): Yes he was found to be negative.

I: And he chased you away or…

R: Yes he sent me away.

110 I: So currently, you do not stay together with him?

R: No, we stopped staying together some time ago (R26:31-year-old separated woman, 67-75).

Another female participant reported losing the trust of her husband in their marital relationship since her husband was negative while she was herself positive. She remarked that:

I have lost trust because since the husband is negative and I am positive, I do not know where this disease came from and you know you cannot be able to read somebody’s mind. Because mostly, people know that HIV is acquired through sexual intercourse. So perhaps he was imagining that I am having sexual intercourse with someone else who had HIV and that is where I got HIV. So the trust, I think it is lost (R42: married woman aged ≥46 years, 77).

The results show that it was more difficult for female participants who were diagnosed to be HIV positive while their husbands were diagnosed HIV negative. They were more often than not put away from the matrimonial home or the husband simply left and began a new relationship.

Some participants also reported being branded by those to whom they disclosed their status or who got to know their status from other sources. As the case of this widowed man aged ≥46 years indicates, the PLHIV often found it difficult yet they had to live within a context where they were the unwilling objects of gossip and backbiting.

You know some of them have not known their status and you know that there in the village, if someone gets to know that “that person is HIV positive” you know that those are things that are there. Some people take it negatively. So instead of being close to you, they remark that

“you know that person is HIV positive” (R31: single man aged ≥46 years, 35-44).

According to the statement of this widower, this was a reality they had to accept and live with. Even though they yearned for closeness from their fellow village mates, all they received were responses of being exposed to open shame.

Other forms of stigma and discrimination were insults and ridicule. As the case of one widow reveals, one’s HIV status was in some cases used as a tool against him or her in instances of any disagreements that ended in verbal confrontations.

Like in our home, we live in a home that is full with people. You may find that when you have a disagreement with someone, the person would hurl insults at you making references to your status. Another sister-in-law told my child not to be boastful because she is the one who would

111 take care of him [when the mother finally dies] (R17: widow aged 26-35 years, 56).

The PLHIV viewed the perpetrators of the acts of insult and ridicule as being insensitive to their circumstances. As the participant further indicates:

…Meaning they have already concluded that I would not be around for long. So that is something the child walks around knowing through other people because they have informed him that his mother could die at any moment (R17: widow aged 26-35 years, 56).

These statements, that were intended to injure or get back at the PLHIV, as the previous excerpt indicates, could also end up affecting the psychological and emotional well-being of the children of PLHIV. The stigmatizing and discriminatory treatment thereby not only affects the PLHIV but their dependants and relatives as well.

There are those who reported being considered as though they were already dead or were likely to die soon because they had been infected with HIV. As this aged ≥46 years male participant reported:

I had some people giving summary comments such as “this guy is dying, he has been infected by that big disease. Him he is dying.” There are people who gave me up to one week [to live]

and there are people who gave me just three days. But I am still alive over this entire period but a majority of them, some of them have also died (R33: married man, aged ≥46 years, 65).

The statements from in-depth interview participants presented above are corroborated by FGD participants. One male youth who participated in one of the FGDs for instance had the following to say:

There are a lot of challenges. I was discriminated, even sharing a cup, talking with the kids, playing with the kids, I was not allowed. Even my plate, I was not supposed to touch anything they were using to play. So that was discrimination to the highest order (FGDMY-001, 158).

A key informant also indicated that PLHIV face discriminatory treatment in the social relationships on account of their HIV status.

Social relationships get changed. You may find that the way you were friends, some will abandon you, but there are some who will still remain with you. At least you will find that there are some who will stay with you and others who will abandon you. Others will also take like a blame game, they will say that you were proud or things like that (KII-002, 33).

112 The above statements show that some of the PLHIV did not find very welcoming treatment from their social circles. And as has been shown from these experiences, some PLHIV indicated experiencing problematic social relationships with the most affected being widows.