In this section, findings related to spiritual dimensions of the lives of PLHIV as human beings are presented. The PLHIV demonstrated that faith in God had a role to play in their lives.
This faith in God was also evidenced in their engagement in religious activities.
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5.3.1 Faith in God
As part of their coping strategies, the participants exhibited an acknowledgment of the role that God plays in their lives. A good number of respondents in both FGDs and in-depth interviews exhibited implicit trust in God’s ability to grant them length of life. The following excerpt from an in-depth interview participant illustrates this trust in God:
“But I will not die. I know that I will take my drugs well and if all goes well, God will give me a bonus of living to enable me care for you [assuring her children]. You are the ones who I now desire that you do not get into the same situation that I am in” (R7: married woman, aged 26-35 years, 21).
The following case of a 52-year-old widow is also a typical example of those who believed that it was God who had willed that they have length of life.
Things that are of value in my life? I see that the greatest benefit in my life is that God is the one who has given me life and it pleases me that my life is prolonged under the grace of God as I take care of my children. My life would have ended long time ago (R50: 52-year-old widow, 65).
Others expressed their trust in God’s intervention by way of the expectation that God would grant them life. Theirs was not expressed in very concrete terms as the previous cases suggest. An example would suffice to demonstrate this view.
Me, I just pray to God that if he extends my life a bit, then I can reach a stage where I can help my child and leave him/her at a good stage. So I had taken my thoughts and committed to God. That a lot of thoughts like “I am sick, or I am this way, I did what, I abandoned. So there is no change in my heart in any manner to make me have some shock (R8: widower, aged ≥46 years, 57).
For some of the participants, God was seen as a source of comfort in their difficult circumstances, who granted them a good state of health. They trusted God to make it possible for an HIV cure to be found. They expressed their trust in God through prayers for healing when sick, prayer for length of life, and through getting saved. Generally they trusted God with their lives and waited for His intervention in their lives.
The participants had a desire to live long so as to enjoy life for themselves and particularly to be able accomplish unfinished projects. The most mentioned among these projects was the need to raise up their children who were still not mature to depend upon themselves.
139 I view myself in the sense that if time can...if medication -because the government is giving us free medication, so I just want to do my things the way I can. When it reaches time that I die, then I will die, and even my children, I know that if God grants me life, then I would find means of educating them, so that even them they find out means of how they can take care of themselves (R20: married man, aged 26-35 years, 50).
So, as has been shown above, the participants had faith in God’s intervention in their lives and trusted that He would grant them length of life to enable them accomplish their life projects and to live to the end of their allotted days. One of their most important projects was the upbringing and education of their children.
5.3.2 Engagement in Religious Activities
As part of their coping strategies, some of the participants indicated that they engaged more intensely in Church and religious activities. This engagement included joining church-related groups. One lady stated that she had stopped associating with groups she considered disadvantageous and had instead joined among others, church-related groups. She had this to say: “But since knowing my status, I joined groups that are church-related, those that are development-minded…” (R38: 44-year-old widow, 37).
For yet another participant, regular attendance at religious meetings, like the weekly worship services, and guiding her children to God’s way was a manifestation of her engagement in religious activities. The following excerpt from a widow aged 36-45 years is illustrative:
The things that are of value in my life are…the thing that I see as being beneficial to me more is going to worship God. I can organize myself so when it reaches on Sunday, I will go and worship my God and I have also placed the children on that way of God (R48: widow, aged 36-45 years, 79).
Being involved in undertaking religious activities such as singing in the Church choir were other ways through which some participants engaged in church activities. One female participant found music therapeutic, as it helped relieve her difficulties. In describing her coping strategies, she had this to say:
Apart from eating and the work I do as a community health worker, I move/walk a lot; that is good for exercise. I also talk with people. Singing, music is therapeutic. After I have walked a lot and I am tired or even when I feel that something is not proceeding smoothly, when I go to Church, when we sing as a choir, when I participate in practice during the trainings, when I go back home I feel refreshed. So singing is also therapeutic (R35: separated woman, aged ≥46 years, 57).
140 As the case presented above indicates involvement in singing was found to be therapeutic. It helped this particular participant to cope with stress-related symptoms. For these particular individuals, faith in God and involvement in church-related activities were important coping strategies that helped them overcome some of their difficulties and live successfully with the realities of being HIV positive.